A man refusing to ask for directions is one of the oldest comedy shticks out there. I swore I'd never go there.
HOWEVER, my son has a talent for changing my mind.
Yesterday afternoon, Mrs. Snark handed her teenager $20 and said, "Son, please ride your bike down to the grocery store and buy me a package of tortillas. We're having tacos for dinner."
After the obligatory grumbling on his part, Mrs. Snark threw in a bribe. "You can go ahead and purchase yourself a package of red licorice."
Properly incentivized, The Boy departed on his bike to the corner market. A half hour later, the door banged open and he returned with a plastic grocery bag clutched in his hand.
"Mom, I couldn't find the tortillas," The Boy said.
Mrs. Snark peered into the bag. "I see you managed to find the licorice."
Mrs. Snark removed the licorice just in case the tortillas were underneath. However, she found only the lonely paper receipt and nothing else.
"Mom, I looked everywhere and there were no tortillas."
"Son, did you ask a grocery store employee where the tortillas were at?" Mrs. Snark asked.
The Boy said: "Mom, I have a brain and I like to find things by myself."
Mrs. Snark bit through her tongue and nearly died from deep vein thrombosis due to the stitch in her side.
Wait for it.
"Son, you do know the bag is empty, don't you? It would appear that your brain has fallen down on the job."
The bedroom door banged shut, swallowing The Boy's reply.