There's a toilet paper holder sitting on the back of the water tank of the toilet in the master bathroom.
Long long ago, we started a major remodel of our master bathroom. The house was built in '88 so all of the original fixtures are brass, and the shower and counter top cultured marble. The roman tub had white marble surround and the faucets no longer worked but couldn't be fixed without a major cutting of the marble to remove the slabs and expose the plumbing.
Oh, and there was carpet--disgusting grungy carpet. One sink basin was cracked and a horrible light box feature took up about a quarter of the vaulted ceiling. It all had to go.
I'm not using the term "long, long ago" facetiously. Aside from the tile, tub plumbing, and the counter top install, Mr. Snark and I are DIYers. We dropped some coin to hire professionals for the stuff we couldn't do but it's been sweat equity all the way on the things we can do such as painting and electrical.
Now, Mr. Snark works only on Saturdays and only then for about three hours at a time. Half of that time is spent standing around, measuring and saying, "I need to go to Home Depot."
The other half is spent at Home Depot.
Mr. Snark gets mixed up sometimes. When the $450 closet doors were too long to hang, he measured once and cut twice. Bye bye closet doors... Expensive mistake.
Naturally, a smart ass friend says, "Doesn't he know that it's measure twice, cut once?"
Mrs. Snark: "Well, he does now."
As the months pass, things do get accomplished occasionally. By now the room is painted, lighting is hung, mirrors and medicine cabinets installed. Towel bars went up and last week Mr. Snark installed a switch plate cover... Progress.
About a month ago, I said to Mr. Snark: "Will you please put the toilet paper holder up in the bathroom. I'm tired of storing teepee on the water tank."
Mr. Snark thoughtfully placed the box containing the holder on the back of the water tank so now we can balance our roll of toilet paper on top of it instead.
The first time I saw it, I thought: Ha, clever. Man, what a smart ass.
I'm a patient woman. I waited and waited, thinking Mr. Snark would eventually decide the joke had gone on long enough. Only I must have misunderstood. Once the holder task was completed, Mr. Snark appears to have deleted it from his "things to do" box.
This morning I said to the hubby, "The toilet paper holder is officially in my 'things I am pissed about' box. Consider yourself warned..."