Mr. Jim Davis owns Garfield |
Yes, yes, I do realize it's Friday.
Monday started out with a sleepless night due to a nasty scrape on my knee and various aches 'n pains thanks to weekend yard work.
In the kitchen, I headed for the coffee pot with the singlemindedness of a zombie going for brains. Water, filter, pot... How hard can it be?
A couple minutes I had a pot full of hot water. Coffee? Oh yeah! Beans!
Okay, take two: water, filter, beans... Check, check, check. So I threw the switch and water went EVERYWHERE.
Shit! Shit! Shit!
POT!
As I sopped up hot water off the counter, Mr. Snark sailed into the kitchen. "Making coffee is a complicated task," he said. "Move aside and allow a MAN to handle it."
Humiliated, I stomped off, grumbling beneath my breath.
Time passed. I recovered from the coffee fiasco and took Miss Bear to the gym. The May day was nice. Warm but not hot. A little cloudy. Miss Bear and I decided to go for a long bike ride. Miss Bear has one of those trailers that hooks on behind my bicycle, so she rides in comfort while I do all the work.
We had a nice lunch and then headed to the library where we browsed books for about an hour. On the way out, the weather took a turn for the worse and it started to sprinkle. Looking up, I decided to take my chances and try to make it home. Miss Bear had an hour left before her naptime and she'd started to get grumpy.
Within a couple minutes of setting out, I knew I'd made a dreadful mistake. The clouds opened and a downpour hit. I got drenched. Fortunately, Miss Bear's trailer has a plastic cover that mostly keeps her dry. Some water seeps in but not a lot.
The bike ride home took a lot longer than it should have. Visibility sucked. I had to watch for oblivious drivers and puddles that might be too deep for the trailer to pass through. It was tense. At one point, I turned off the main road onto a side street because there was no sloped area, no proper crosswalk and no light.
I reached an appropriate area for crossing and naturally some dude in a big white pickup truck drove up and wanted to make a left hand turn in front of me. I waved him to go because I had no intention of entering a roadway with any sort of traffic on it in the pouring rain.
Lucky me, the jackass proved to be a gentleman. No, you go. He waved and waited. I indicated no and he pointed, waved, waited some more in the bone dry cab of his freakin' truck with no regard at all for the fact that I was cold, miserable and getting unhappier with each passing second. I swear, if he'd climbed out of the pickup right then, I'd have throttled him.
Eventually, he went and we were finally able to cross. With about a mile left, Miss Bear started to whine. I trudged along for the final stretch, put the bike away and the second I entered the house, my eyes started to sting from sweat washing into them from my forehead. Not just stinging but burning and itching like crazy.
Blinded by watering eyes and a running nose, I put Miss Bear down for her nap and groped through the medicine cabinet. I dumped a half bottle of Visine into each eyeball. Then I staggered to a chair and collapsed into a lifeless heap, feeling like Monday had dropped a piano on top of me.
It was a bad Monday. I suppose things could have been worse. Someone could have died...
I'm recovering. Tuesday, I approached the coffee pot and successfully brewed a batch. I'm finally able to write about it.
I'm thinking that I'll be able to approach my bike again by tomorrow without shuddering.
Maybe.
Aww. I'm glad you found the humor in the situation:)
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