Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Snark Mattress

Mr. Snark and I had a horrible memory foam mattress. The awful thing was hotter than a three dollar pistol, especially in the summer, and cost me countless hours of sleep.  Additionally, Mr. Snark's side sloped downward at a 45 degree.

Life seems determined to deliver "Things That Cause Insomnia" to my doorstep. After all, it brought me Mr. Snark, who prior to acquiring a sleep apnea machine, snored like a buzz saw.

Anyway, I digress...

So after years of living with the memory foam monster, we replaced it with a queen-sized non-memory foam mattress. (Yes, they still make those. With springs. If you go to the store there are about 3 you can choose from.)

The new mattress is a little firmer than the old one, which takes some getting used to but I'm adjusting. However, I have belatedly discovered that what I thought was a flaw of the old mattress was actually a blessing.

Mr. Snark has taken to sleeping dead center on his side of the mattress. He's taking up half of the bed!  I've tried waking him, shoving him over and even complained.

"Honey, get back on your quarter of the bed!"

So far, I haven't found a way to fix the problem. Mr. Snark doesn't seem to grock the severe inequity of the new arrangement.

 Suggestions are welcome.


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5 comments:

  1. Drug his dinner drink, knock him on the floor, and when he wakes, innocently say, "how'd you get down there?"
    So you hate the memory foam, they say the air mattress is good. No water beds, and I have nightmare memories of those things!

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    Replies
    1. Mary,
      I had a water bed in college and I loved it but the darn thing was so heavy and such a pain in the neck. No more! :D

      Delete
  2. I LOVE my foam mattress, but whether or not it has a memory I couldn't say. The thing with springs is that they need turning. If you've ever tried to flip a king size mattress you'd probably go running back to foam with open arms.

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    Replies
    1. Andrea,
      I wouldn't mind foam except for the heat. Anyway, the new mattresses rotate. No flipping. :-)

      Delete
  3. Cute post. Congrats on the new mattress!

    ReplyDelete